Thou Shalt Submit [part two] ...

Because of the separation of the second chapter from the third chapter in Peter’s first letter to the church, often verse one of chapter three is read as if it is the start of a new conversation, or a new admonition from Peter’s counsel.  It is not.  It is the continuation of our study on the strategy of submission to conquer evil.  In our previous examination of chapter two, we begin to see how Peter progressively raises the stakes in asking the church to show love, even in the face of evil.  Despite the absolute corruption, malice, and pagan indoctrination of the Roman system of government; Peter offers zero counsel to rebel, and instead asks us to submit to every ordinance of man, for the sake of the gospel.  When we are cheated, we are to be honest and loving in return.  When others speak lies, and accuse us falsely, we are to remain steadfast, upright, and speak no words of reprisal.  In this sense Peter is only reinforcing the teachings of Jesus when He asked us to love our enemies.

But the level of submission Peter asks is more than just our submission to Christ of our will in order to be transformed by the power of His love.  It is to allow that transformation to effect “how” we love others.  As we adopt the love of Christ into us, as it becomes part of us; we begin to lose the distinctions between friends and enemies.  People are only people.  They are to be loved, no matter how they respond to that love.  Those who have responded to the love of Christ might make an effort to return love when it is extended to them.  But the goal is not to see love extended only so that we see love returned.  It is to see love extended no matter what the outcome.  Sinners, after all, are the ones MOST in need of the love of Christ reflected through you.  It is not through violence, that evil can be extinguished from the hearts of man; it is only through a choice to love.  Peter sets a very clear mirror for us from which to examine our progress in our spiritual transformation … how humble can we be in the face of injustice, and how loving can we be in the face of undeserved evil. 

These are not popular words today.  They were no more popular in Peter’s own day.  The natural human condition rebels against oppression and injustice.  Our sentiment today is to resort to violence to achieve “justice”.  It was so in days of old as well.  It is the clarion call of Satan to demand “justice”.  For equality would see an eye taken for an eye, and a life taken for a life – that is justice.  But it is not the way of our God, for our God prefers mercy over justice.  He offers forgiveness rather than the rewards we have truly earned.  He loves us despite what we have done, and offers to free us from the chains that would bind us to repeating the failures of the past.  He pays our penalties Himself so that justice need not be visited upon us.  But to be free, we must be made free.  We must submit ourselves to Christ to be transformed by His love, submitting our decisions, our desires, and thus our actions.  In the last study, we come to realize, that the preferred state of one who loves, is submissive, not aggressive.  To see love win, we must be willing to obey, even when obedience is not what we believe is “fair”.  Instead of rebellion against the corruption of Rome, Peter asks that we honor Roman rule.  Instead of meeting violence with violence, we are to meet it with patience and love.

It is ONLY after men understand what has been asked of them with regards to submission that we can continue with the admonitions found in chapter three.  They are not isolated from each other, with wives asked to submit, and husbands to be made free from submission in general.  No, the prerequisites of submission have had a long prolog in chapter two, and now we continue with this these beginning in verse one of chapter three as Peter writes … “Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;”  The word “likewise” is a reference to how the unbelievers come to know the love of Christ as discussed in the previous examples.  As Christians maintain a spirit of love and charity, and humble obedience even to the unjust edicts of men, they bare witness of a strength outside of themselves.  The transforming power of the love of Christ is made evident in our ability to remain humble and loving in the face of injustice. 

It is ironic that husband’s, and men in general, miss the subtlety of Peters inference.  Peter has just been describing how unjust oppressors discover Christ through the loving response of humble Christians.  Here Peter offers to wives the word “likewise” – perhaps meaning that he understands that husbands too are often unjust in how they treat their wives.  Peter continues that the direct influence of a wife upon her husband is profound.  Loving words spoken in humility by a wife who has discovered the treasure of serving her husband are nearly impossible to ignore.  The hardest man can be melted by the softest woman.  No matter what the husband is compelled to face and deal with in his quest to provide for his family, he cannot ignore the simple, uplifting conversations that love can inspire in a wife who prizes service.  It does not take Biblical brow-beating, or forced exposure to the word of God, to reach the still unconverted heart of the husband.  It only takes consistent love reflected in the consistent conversations of the wife.  The living witness is more powerful than the written word.  For if the word is not alive in you, of what value is it?

Peter continues in verse 2 … “While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. [verse 3] Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; [verse 4] But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.”  In this Peter has destroyed the entire fashion industry.  For as with all things, the inside will matter more than the surface.  To be clear, Peter is not advocating that women become nudists, refrain from cleanliness and good hygene practices, let the hair run wild, abandon make-up – but – wear only a meek and mild spirit.  While these ideas might appeal to some men, it would be unwise to attempt to use this scripture to achieve these goals.  However, Peter is making a clear statement about the priorities of “how” a woman reaches the heart of a man.  Bad news ladies … it is not in the new hair-do, or the myriad of jewelry you wear, or in that “to die for” new outfit on the manikins in the department store window.  It is captured in the counsel already given – it is in respect, upright conversations, humility, and consistency of love shown.  It is in our humility that God is able to reach us, it is why he prizes the meek and quiet spirit so highly, and why it is of such value in a wife.

Keep in mind, Peter is not just looking to impart general marital advice, he is talking specifically here about how a Christian woman reaches the heart of an unconverted husband, that she might introduce her husband to the Christ she serves.  The bond of matrimony is not strong enough to overcome the freewill choice of a spouse.  They cannot be saved because you are righteous.  They are not transformed by the love of Christ, just because you are.  These are individual choices, that each one of us must make.  If only one partner in a marriage makes the choice to be transformed, only one will be ready to live eternally in the city and existence He is currently preparing for us.  There will be no greater sadness than to face that eternity in solitude, because the partner we shared a life with here on earth, was never reached by the love we “could” have shown, and for selfish reasons, simply didn’t.  Peter offers the heart of woman, a method for insuring she is not alone on that great day, but is able to stand with the man she has chosen to love.

Peter continues in verse 5 … “For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: [verse 6] Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.”  Here is where it gets interesting.  Peter writes that this method has worked before.  Holy women in days past have trusted in God to transform their hearts, and make them able to consistently serve and love their own husbands.  Through their influence men were brought to God.  More interesting is the example of Sara who is said to have obeyed Abraham and called him lord.  Could it be, that Abraham was prompted to begin his search to find God, because of the influence of his wife Sara?  Could it be, that the much touted faith of Abraham was strengthened and supported by the largely invisible wife Sara?  There were no sayings regarding the matriarch of the Jewish faith.  Sons of Abraham was a popular designation, daughters of Sara much less so.  Yet does Peter here offer us some insight, that perhaps the mighty man of faith, owed much of this reputation to the consistent humility of his wife whose influence was a powerful one?

Peter continues in verse 7 … “Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.”  Peter again uses the word “likewise”.  Perhaps here he refers to the Abraham reference cited above, a recognition that the influence of our wife on our faith is profound – whether for better or worse.  He counsels husbands to dwell with them according to knowledge.  Do not forget that it is God you serve, and He who you love first, in order that you may then find immeasurable love for your wife through Him.  Husbands are to care for their wives as unto the weaker vessel.  Peter is not demeaning the strength of a Christian woman.  He is instead asking husbands to care for their wives as if handling precious china, something that is tender, can break, can be damaged by inattention or a lack of care.  Things that are irreplaceable must be handled with great care so that they are always valued, and never thrown carelessly aside.

Then Peter raises the stakes again.  He tells us that we are … “being heirs together” of the grace of life.  When once the bonds of matrimony are made, when two choose to become one, they are indeed seen as one.  Yes, each of us must choose to submit to Christ, and be transformed by the power of His love.  But having made that choice, as well as the one to be bound in marriage, we are “heirs” together.  We inherit the life and home in our heavenly destination as one.  When in Eden God determined it was not good for man to be alone, His wisdom was not colored by sin, or its effects.  Man was created and pronounced good.  But the addition of a wife makes him better.  The two individuals who form a family unit are made stronger in the joining than they were by themselves.  Men must understand this.  The knowledge of the eternal implications of our choices cannot be understated.  When God says the word forever, he is not thinking in terms of a 70 year life span.  He is thinking about forever, an existence that extends well beyond this corruptible one.  When we bind ourselves till death do us part, we recognize human frailty, but in so doing deny ourselves the potential of what might still be to come.

The advice Peter offers comes with a warning … “that your prayers be not hindered”.  Service, care and love for our wives, cannot be omitted while we think ourselves as having achieved spiritual enlightenment.  We have chosen to serve and love them, and how we do this, is a reflection of the transformation our Lord has wrought in our hearts.  To pray to God for things we “want”, while ignoring the needs of our wives, is to have our prayers hindered.  It is a reflection of our selfishness in how we pray.  The needs of others should top our prayer list; of those our wives should be first in line.  To ignore the needs of our wife, is to ignore the half of our one-ness.  It is literally to work against our own best interest.  The unity institutionalized in marriage is no trivial or temporary thing.  And as Peter states here we face our next life as joint heirs in the grace our Lord offers us.

Peter’s counsel to submit flies in the face of the untransformed heart.  It does go against our human nature and natural inclinations.  But it stands as the strategy employed by our God to see us saved.  While in this world, Jesus obeyed the laws of the Romans, and made no effort to dethrone them.  He submitted to Roman rule, even when it cost him torture and death.  To remain consistent in meeting evil with love is not something the normal human can expect to maintain.  It can only come through the transforming power of Jesus in our lives.  It can only come as we let Christ remake how we thing, what we value, what we want.  It takes a literal overhaul of our human nature to see the wisdom of Peter’s words.  Those obsessed with justice, cannot understand this approach.  And in the end, those obsessed with justice will never find it.  For “justice” is a very subjective standard, and the true equality it would demand is a price few are willing to pay.

But entrance into heaven, is not based on the justice of what we deserve.  It is instead based on the mercy that would see us transformed from one who earned death repeatedly, to one who would love others and willingly die to see them spared.  This is the example our Lord set for us.  This is the path we are all traveling on.

And Peter had only begun to describe what it is like to love another …